JOKES

[radstockjeff]

Why is it that haemorrhoids are called haemorrhoids and not assteroids?

[Tresagreen]

If you're American when you go into the bathroom and American when you come out, what are you whilst you are in the bathroom? European. ......... An old lady went to the pet store, found a parrot and asked the owner if she could buy it.The owner said "heck no, that parrot has a bad mouth. Trust me you do not want that parrot" She said, " I can teach it good manners" . But when she got home, the parrot said a bad word, so she put it in the freezer for 10 seconds. When she took it out, she asked " have you learnt your lesson?" The parrot said another bad word, so she put it back for 30 seconds. She then asked again, "have you learnt your lesson?" " Brrrr, yes " said the parrot, " I have learnt MY lesson" , but what did the chicken do wrong?"

[radstockjeff]

[radstockjeff]

A friend of mine recently had a very good win on the lottery.

So I said to him

"Congratualtions, how are you going to manage all those begging letters?"

"No probs" he said "I shall continue writing them just the same as before"

[Tresagreen]

What did the drummer call his twin daughters? ..... Anna one, Anna two !